Esoteric insiders are buzzing about William Shatner's appearance on C2C tonight. To the uninitiated, it appears that Shatner will be on to schill his new autobiography Up Till Now. But, as always, there's more to the story than that, my friends.

My sources inside the ivory towers of esoterica tell me that at some point during the show, Shatner and Noory will announce their impending spin-off of The Shat's popular ABC program Boston Legal.

The premise of the series is simple ... Shatner's character Denny Crane finally becomes fully afflicted with mad cow disease. His ensuing dementia is compounded by his teaming up with Richard C. Hoagland on a frivolous lawsuit against "the Cydonia region of Mars."

Disgraced and shunned by the mainstream legal community, Hoagland and Crane turn to the one man who understands esoteric justice: George "The Noor" Noory. Noory quickly rents out an abandoned Hilary Clinton campaign headquarters in Albuquerque and turns it into the first-ever paranormal law office ... Noory Legal.

Noory Legal will premiere on ABC Family Channel sometime in 2009.