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:: Review: 2007 ::

Just when you thought you'd seen the last of me, Khyron returns for 2008!

2007...what a piece of crap. Yeah, you heard me. 2007 sucked the big one. From things in my personal life to developments in the entertainment and esoteric medias, it was 365 days of disappointments on top of let downs. Get your beating sticks, it's paddling time.

I'm sure you all are as sick of 2007 retrospectives as I am, but guess what? It's time for another one...

I honestly can't think of a worse year for me than 2007. My life played out like a checklist to some depressing country western song. Thank God I don't own a pickup truck, because odds are that it would have broken down.

So let us see then what the stars had predicted for us. Your standard horoscope is pretty lame, so I'm really more of a numerology guy. Numerology is great because it makes you feel both smart and spiritual. The sense of accomplishment you get from calculating some simple addition in your head and using it to predict your life is infinitely better than just reading some vaguely written horoscope.

2007. 2 + 0 + 0 + 7 = 9. That's how it's done, right? Well in any case, a Google search of "2007 numerology" tells us that a '9' year is one of extremes of personal growth and change. Moreover, those with a 'life path' of a 9 (which would be myself) were predicted to have a challenging year filled with health issues and major lifestyle changes. You know, I was looking forward to ripping numerology to shreds tonight...but the more I think of it, the predictions were pretty much on the money.

Moving on.

As was made clear in both Art Bell's annual Coast to Coast AM predictions show as well as Ian Punnett's follow-up 'professional' psychic roundup, the usual suspects in the world of prognostication were about as accurate as ever. Which is to say not very. As was to be expected, vagueness won out with the help of sure bets such as "economic problems" and "strange weather". Unfortunately we didn't get a repeat on-air meltdown like Sylvia Brown's now infamous 'Minergate' debacle.

So what else went down, then? The so-called 'drone' UFO was probably the standout story in the world of esoterica. Although it turned out to be nothing more than a chance for Linda Moulton Howe to stay busy and may or may not have been part of a Halo 3 viral ad campaign. Then of course everyone was buzzing about the vanishing bees for a while, but I guess they worked out their problems on their own because I just ate myself some delicious fruit not but a few minutes ago.

I covered the fall TV lineup to some extent, but ultimately it too proved to be a disappointment. Heroes' second season was a pretty big drop in quality compared to its stellar first, Bionic Woman was unwatchably bad, and Flash Gordon was an altogether failure. To make things worse, my two favorite new shows, Journeyman and Cavemen, were both canceled before being fully realized. At least Battlestar Galactica Razor was able to deliver, if not leaving me utterly anxious for the full season. But then of course that writers strike put the kibosh on my TV viewership.

The silver screen releases were likewise hit and miss. There were a few gems--such as Sunshine, Grindhouse, The Bourne Ultimatum, and No Country for Old Men--but a slew of hyped up summer blockbusters bombed big. Bruce Willis in Live Free or Die Hard, for instance, left a sour taste in my mouth I thought not possible from a Die Hard flick. Also Michael Bay's Transformers was entirely forgettable.

In the world of The K-Files, my overlord Tim Binnall informs me that I managed to BS my way through 43 new columns in 2007. I'm confident 13 or so were probably read. So for those that took the time to do so, I offer you my gratitude and sincere apologies. 2007 also saw the start of tragically ignored Movie Loft reviews. Stay tuned on that front, as I hope to start pumping them out on a more regular basis soon.

Alright, that about does it for me this week. I've wasted enough time as it is on this poor excuse for a year. So strap up and get ready for a whole new year of The K-Files.

:: Dead End ::

Well, that's all for this week. I trust you enjoyed your trip into this shadowy nether-realm known only as the K-Files.

For the latest updates on the world of Khyron, bookmark http://www.khyron.net/. With content updated regularly, you're sure to find your fix for all things entertaining and paranormal. As always, feel free to send any questions/comments/suggestions to KFiles@khyron.net.

Keep your eyes peeled for the next  K-Files, arriving sometime next week. Later.

~Khyron, 2007.


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