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Grey Matter


Dreaming of the Dead

A few years ago, I tried Melatonin. It was the big new "all natural" sleep aide. What with all the hype, you would have thought that someone would mention the side effects, but nobody I heard bothered to mention any side effects back then. After taking it only 2 or 3 times I threw it out. I had the worst, most vivid and real seeming nightmares of my life. Years later, I found out that Melatonin is similar to DMT, then it all made sense.

Recently, I found a time release version of Melatonin and decided to give it a try. It does seem to enhance dreams, but not to create those horrible nightmares that taking a full doze of Melatonin does.

So, I have been experimenting with the time release formula, off and on, for a little while now to see if it would cause any alien related or esoteric dreams. Also because normally when I sleep I don't remember my dreams at all the next day. Last night I did have a strange esoteric dream:

I was in my kitchen (loading the dishwasher or doing something with the dishes) when I heard static, like from the radio. Suddenly the static faded away and my grandmother, who will have been dead twenty years on April 9th, started talking to me. She wasn't physically in the room and I believe I was hearing her in my mind, not a literal voice that anyone walking in would have heard, but I am not entirely sure. We had a short conversation that I don't recall and then the voice went away. A few seconds later she was back and I was relieved because I had forgot to tell her how much I love her! I told her that (I was actually speaking in the dream, not just saying it in my mind) and she told me the same, then the static noise returned and then went silent and I knew she was gone that time.

I remember that I was full of joy that I had got to speak to her and then I woke up.

Like the horrible dreams I had on the full doses of melatonin, this dream seemed more real than other dreams I normally have.

I am not saying that I was actually, literally, conversing with my dead grandmother in a dream, but I am not saying that I wasn't either. Frankly, I like to think that I was. I know the minute she spoke I recognized the voice and I really wish I could remember what we talked about during the first part of that dream.

The unique thing about this dream was that I had never dreamed of a ghost before. I have had dreams about dead family members, but in the context that they were still alive. Sometimes I would snap during the dream and say "but you are dead!" Then they would explain to me that was a mistake and really they had just been in the hospital for all that time or something like that. Which made perfect sense in a dream.

Just a strange synchronicity, sort of, that day was the 1 year anniversary of my sister Becky's death. I suppose it would have been more of a synchronicity had it been Becky, but since I don't normally dream of being visited by departed loved ones -- I am happy anyone stopped by, even if it was just a dream.

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