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9.22.8

Harbingers of Dumb

There's three things I don't like. The first is people telling me what to do. The second is people telling me who I am. The third is people telling me how much time I have left to disprove the first and second thing I don't like.

But that hasn't stopped doomsday prophets from going off at the mouth about the end of the world. As it stands, in 2012, most probably on Christmas day, because you can't get any more outlandish and insulting than that, something is going to happen. Something so cataclysmic that everything you know will cease to be. No more reality TV, no more Superbowl and no more bacon cheddar cheeseburgers at Wendy's.

Everything will die.

Now, how this end of things is supposed to come about is not carefully plotted out. Either there's going to be an impact of some sort with a 12th Planet the size of Jupiter (or bigger), or a comet or...or, some evil alien race is going to swoop down from the heavens and start blowing us to smithereens with their super-dooper space weapons.

Then there's the fringe, religious and pretty much outright plausible ways we could go. There's the whole Earth getting fed up deal. Which essentially means, the planet will try to undue what damage humankind has already incurred by causing floods, ice-ages and what-not. Or, Jesus and his angels may come down to take only the good people who are worthy...the ones who've eaten all their vegetables, stayed away from rock music and denounced sex.

But that doesn't happen until after the devil comes down with his minions and starts building space weapons to keep Jesus and his brethren from entering our atmosphere. You name it, I've heard it. Heck, I won't lie. I've come to believe some of it, over time. Not the stuff that'll get you a free ride to the mental ward in a bright white jacket. No. Heck if I even believe it'll happen in 2012 (or, 2013).

What I do believe is that all good things must come to an end. So, if the worlds going to end, it will. There's nothing we can do to stop it. But what I also believe is that humanity is like cockroaches. We always seem to rise up outta the dust and continue onward. Our ancestors have been passing down this truth for ages.

Everytime someone or something decides to wipe us out, we always come back. Some of us are just more resilient. Some of us are going to have no problem living in a cave until the day comes when it's alright to set foot on the surface again. If you think about it, us city folk are more than primed and ready for doomsday.

We've been living our lives in the Thunderdome, since birth. We walk the streets at night with our belongings tucked tight under our arm, our eyes on alert and 911 on speed dial. We know what neighborhoods not to get lost in. We know what kind of people stand on corners to rest after a long walk, and what kind of people stand on corners to make a buck.

We've seen the worst. We've lived in dystopia long enough to know what to do when the time comes when the sky turns black and the sun disappears and creepy, crazy stuff starts happening.

Somewhere along the line, when doomsayers started preaching this stuff, I think they forgot that we're a generation raised on the end of the world scenarios. We're far more prepared than our ancestors ever were. Then again, we've got skyscrapers. They had pyramids. We've got cars...they had boats. We've got tv's, ipods, laptops and xbox's. They had the Ark of the Covenant, the Spear of Destiny, the Tree of Life and those weird little purse things all the gods used to carry around. Maybe we're screwed after all.


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